I almost regret speaking publicly about my financial problems.  I say almost because in spite of the backlash, sharing my problems turned out to be a great decision.  I’ve received more support than I ever imagined, and things are really starting to look up.  To those of you who used my debt as a fuel to criticize me, go fuck yourself! ^_^  I’m not even going to address the negativity anymore.  I’m not going to cater to the childish jealousy, rumors, insults.  I have a wonderful fan base that deserves my attention far more.  To those of you who have chipped in, I’ll never be able to express my gratitude appropriately.  I wish I could reach out and hug you.  Thanks to a little extra hard work, generous donations, and an all around better attitude, I will be making a very large payment on a credit card this week.  I have money left over to pay all of my bills on time, for groceries & other necessities.

I may have mentioned I had an unexpected hospital visit during the summer.  That set me back a bit with my debt, but the medical bills are almost paid off.  I finally feel like I’m making some progress.  My site is doing good, my debt is being chipped away, and I feel like somehow I’m becoming a better person every day.  It might be some time before I’ll have the type of lifestyle I hope for, but I think I might be able to buy a house as soon as one year from now.  It’s crazy how debt can weigh you down and kill your motivation.  I admit, I hate not being able to spend the money I earn on fun stuff.  I’m so grateful that I have such generous fans.  Donations & wish list gifts keep me from having nothing.  My memberships are building up, as well as my paychecks.  I won’t hold my breath hoping for a life of luxury, but I see now that being comfortable is within my reach.  I’m also somewhat bi polar, so don’t be surprised if I’m crying about how much life sucks next week.  I always get over it.

For the past couple of weeks, my face has looked like this.  Don’t mind the gross wet tangled hair.  Imagine a better happy face actually.  I look kinda stoned or sleepy here.  Yesterday was a casual day of camming.

I’m so eager for my next tattoo appointment!  Which by the way, is also financed thanks to someone who wanted me to have it.  Again I was asked why I’m spending money on tattoos while I’m in debt.  Haha, so predictable!  I might have financial problems, but I totally admit I’m spoiled rotten. <3 I’m not even bragging, I’m gushing.  If someone gave you money to spend on something you want, you’d do it too.

Yesterday I made the most amazing fried calamari I’ve ever had.  I had a salad and a power bar earlier in the day, so that’ll be my excuse for eating fried food.  ^_^  I know I know, bad excuse.  I’ll never be able to give up my goodies!  I just need to work out more.

I used this recipe by Giada De Laurentiis, with a few little changes.  I used beaten egg before flouring to make a slightly thicker batter.  Also I added some grated parmesan to the flour mixture, because I’m a glutton.  It turned out absolutely delicious!  I’m sure leaving out the egg and cheese would’ve resulted in a lighter recipe, but honestly I never seem to have a problem gaining weight from fatty foods.  It’s the flour that was a no no.  For those of you who only have had the typical fried rings, (that part is the body)  you have to try the tentacles.  They’re the best part.  Kinda cute too, so I feel guilty for enjoying nomming down on them.

I used ready to cook cleaned squid, but I rinsed it again after chopping it up just to be safe.  When you fry squid, you have to make sure your oil is the right temperature and never overcook.  Overcooking results in tough rubber bands rather than tender rings.  Ick!  It’s a time consuming dish to make because you have to fry in small batches, but pretty simple overall.  I think I might make it as an appetizer for Christmas dinner.

I’m so mad at myself for not using my good camera, but I’ve only taken it out for bigger projects so far.